(Originally written March 6th 2010)
Released: March 26th 2010
Plot: A hapless young Viking who aspires to hunt dragons becomes the unlikely friend of a young dragon himself, and learns there may be more to the creatures than he assumed.
Review: I think there are only 2 things that I’ll get up at 8am for on a Saturday, free food or a free screening. In this case, it’s the latter. I managed to wake up and schlepped some 15 miles away all for a free IMAX movie. I was grumpy, tired, and SURROUNDED by little kids with lots of energy and parents who couldn’t control them. When the movie started, the first thing we see is a bouncing ball jumping out at us to basically inform the audience that yes, this is indeed in 3D. My eyes hate 3D because I can’t 3D that well and just based off this little graphic, I was sure I was going to hate this movie. But I was very wrong.
Released: August 18th, 2010
Plot: A spoof of vampire-themed movies, where teenager Becca finds herself torn between two boys. As she and her friends wrestle with a number of different dramas, everything comes to a head at their prom.
Review: Now, you may be wondering why I’m watching a movie that was written and directed by the same guys who wrote and directed Disaster Movie, Date Movie and Epic Movie (all of which would end up in my “most hated movies” list) Well, the answer is, I’m a sadomasochist and I enjoy putting myself through vigorous amounts of agony. Oh and Ken Jeong.
The things I like most about Winter’s Bone are the things it doesn’t do. They’re things that other writers or directors might do with this story, these characters, or the setting. And it’s not to say that doing them is a BAD thing, it’s just refreshing and interesting to watch a movie that doesn’t go the road that others’ would’ve likely taken with this project. Sorry I’m being all Meatloaf-y and not explaining the “that.” Allow me to go ahead and do that.
Released: April 1st, 2010
Plot:A New Yorker moves to Los Angeles in order to figure out his life while he house sits for his brother, and he soon sparks with his brother’s assistant.
Review: Greenberg is where today’s hipsters go to die. Let me start of by saying that I’m not a huge fan of Noah Baumbach as a director or storyteller, but I am a fan of his writing and ability to create some interesting characters. Baumbach does a great job at crafting strange and idiosyncratic characters and I personally think that character driven movies are some of the best movies.
I know it might sound stupid, and this might not be the most appropriate place to say this, but one day I want to make movies. In fact, I know dozens of people who would one day like to make movies. We’ve all got ideas and the motivation to get stuff done, but we just can’t afford to stop what we’re doing and make movies for the rest of our lives. We don’t have a major studio giving us any money or support for our movies, but for some reason, they trust M. Night Shyamalan, a man who hasn’t made a legitimately good (not great, just good) movie in a decade. They trust him so much that they backed his movie with almost $300 million, let him run off unsupervised, and said, “Go crazy!”
You may be asking, what the fuck is Undisputed? Or more to the point, what the fuck is Undisputed 3: Redemption? Well, Undisputed 3 is a direct-to-DVD prison fight movie with a bunch of people you’ve never heard of, made by someone you’ve never heard of. Nonetheless, as unappealing as that may seem, the movie is pretty fucking awesome.
Now, if you were to do a little search of hype/talk/reviews about this movie, most people would be talking about the “like OMG totally amazing fight choreography” and fight scenes, so let me get that out of the way. They are good. Very good. Especially for a direct-to-DVD fighting movie. BUT. For me, I like my movie fights to be realistic. As far as I’m concerned, showing a guy knock someone out in one brutal punch is much more telling of his toughness than 50 montages of gleaming, sweaty muscles, grunts, and ridiculous fights where each behemoth lands haymaker after haymaker, only to be standing after 95 rounds. But that’s just me. At the same time, I realize that this movie isn’t going for that. It’s going for choreography and endless punches being landed. To its’ credit, this movie not only has wonderful fight choreography, but the director and actors make it look quite real. You can see some punches definitely land. The flesh ripples out in a flash and the muscles contract, and you see it, which really adds a layer of awesomeness to the whole thing.
It’s always so much easier to figure out why you don’t like a movie than to put into words why you do. After seeing a movie like Toy Story 3, you leave the theater smiling, thinking to yourself, “Wow, that was great!” But why was it great?
These are characters that almost everyone that I know has grown up with. In this movie, we are all Andy: a now grown up kid, unwillingly forced to leave his childhood behind him. Maybe that’s why this worked so well for me, as well as it seemed to work for the packed audience of other twenty-something I saw it with. Everyone was laughing uproariously, sometimes so much, I couldn’t hear dialogue for seconds at a time. Just as I’m sure there were many who were crying as the final minutes of the movie played, knowing that this was the end of this story, and seeing just how perfect that ending was.
There’s not much to say about Jonah Hex, not only because it’s not a very good movie, but also because, with a running time of 80 minutes, there just isn’t much movie here to critique.
Normally, people criticize a movie for being too long, for having too many plots that don’t go anywhere, and filler that serves no purpose. Watching Jonah Hex, you can see that the problem is quite the opposite: there’s no room in this clip show of a movie for anything to happen. It feels like nothing happens because after something does happen, we’ve already moved onto the next thing, which doesn’t feel important at all, seeing as there’s no gravity to the situation. In addition to the feeling of disinterest the filmmakers seem to have with their own film, the audience can’t be bothered to care about anything because it’s over as soon as it’s introduced.